₹14,82,403recovered this week
live · ingesting metav1.0 — calcutta build

your ads
bleed.
we text
you where.
thrice a day.

noem is an AI media buyer that lives on WhatsApp. it reads your meta ads, finds the leaks, and sends three sharp briefs every day. you act in one tap. no dashboards. no babysitting.

read-only · revoke anytime
₹14.8L
recovered this week
1,240
founders on board
35s
to first verdict
3×/day
whatsapp briefs
₹14,82,403 recovered this weekthree briefs daily7:00 · 14:00 · 20:00 ISTread-only meta accessno dashboard. no logins.pay once. receive briefs.1,240 founders signed₹14,82,403 recovered this weekthree briefs daily7:00 · 14:00 · 20:00 ISTread-only meta accessno dashboard. no logins.pay once. receive briefs.1,240 founders signed₹14,82,403 recovered this weekthree briefs daily7:00 · 14:00 · 20:00 ISTread-only meta accessno dashboard. no logins.pay once. receive briefs.1,240 founders signed
the product

it lives
where you live.

no app to install. no dashboard to forget. three crisp messages a day, delivered to the inbox you already check 80 times.

7:00
morning brief
14:00
midday pulse
20:00
evening verdict
9:41
noem
online
how it works

three steps.
that's it.

connect once. we do the rest, every day, forever.

step / connect01/03
noem.

plug in meta.

thirty seconds. read-only oauth. we never edit, never post, never touch.

step / diagnose02/03

we read everything.

35 seconds. every campaign, ad set, ad. cross-referenced. ranked. weighed.

step / deliver03/03

briefs hit whatsapp.

three a day. one tap to act. one tap to dismiss. no dashboard. no fluff.

the journey

five frames.
one product.

from connection to recovery — every step, in plain sight.

01
day zero

you connect.

thirty seconds. no card.

₹0
setup cost
02
minute one

we read everything.

every campaign. every ad set.

1.2M
data points scanned
03
the verdict

we find the leak.

₹14,200 bleeding. daily.

₹14,200
recoverable / day
04
tomorrow 7 am

first brief lands.

on whatsapp. like a friend.

07:00
ist · daily
05
every morning

until it stops leaking.

and then some.

briefs per day
clarity vs chaos

this.
not that.

seventeen tabs and a spreadsheet, or one whatsapp message that already knows the answer.

tuesday, 11:47 am · still looking
business.facebook.com/adsmanager
campaignsad setsadsaudiencescreativereports
metric
metric
metric
campaignspendroas
Cold-Audience-Mar₹84,2000.8x
Retargeting-Cart₹62,4001.2x
Lookalike-1pct₹91,1000.6x
Brand-Defensive₹28,8002.1x
Carousel-AI₹47,2000.9x
Video-15s-Test₹19,4001.4x
tuesday, 7:00 am · already acted
● §02 EXHIBIT
Retargeting-Cart
Frequency 6.4. CTR halved.
Recoverable: ₹3,280/day
→ open in meta
7:00 am

one card. one action. the rest of your day, yours.

pricing

one card.
one price.

pay once. receive briefs for thirty days. cancel by simply not paying again. the simplest thing on the internet.

basic / one-time
₹499
30 days · ₹16/day · < one chai
what you get
  • 3 briefs/day — 7:00, 14:00, 20:00 IST
  • read-only meta access. revoke anytime.
  • no auto-debit. no card on file. ever.
  • first verdict in 35 seconds.
  • humans answer your replies. no bots in the way.

● pay once · receive briefs · no surprises